I left the apartment shortly after 3pm and hurried down the hill so as not to be late for the start of the High Heel Race signifies the official opening of Baltimore Pride. The race was slated to begin at 3:30, but they weren’t even close to starting at that time (a development I should have expected).
The real bummer was that they changed it “due to cir-cum-stances beyond our control” they changed it from a “high heel race” to a “flip-flop race.” Yes, flip-flops are hard to run in, but the point of the race is a) that heels are even harder to run in and b) embarrass
the straight guys by making them wear women’s shoes. Even worse, the contestants had to provide their own flip-flops.
The parade started around 4:07pm. Sure, I could describe the cars, floats and assorted scantily clad marchers… but why bother? A parade is a parade, and this one was no different – after the 3rd or 4th car with an ugly drag queen hanging out of it, they all started to melt together.
Around 5pm, I staggered off to get something to eat with my feet, legs and bum asleep. The food there was the same overpriced fare you get at any street fair, and their quality definitely hasn’t improved over the years. I left as soon as I finished my overcooked kabob, and decided to stop and get something more substantial to eat on my way back to my apt.
The next day was more laid back. I didn’t have nearly as many events to attend, which meant I could stay at the Pride Festival as long as I wanted…or as long as the weather held out.
I arrived just after noon, and headed straight to the food alley where I purchased the most bland, tasteless and overcooked sandwich I’ve ever had. I then walked around the various other booths along the lake until arriving back at the food stands where I bought a doughy, slightly undercooked funnel cake.
I got up to throw out the other half of my funnel cake when I noticed it was starting to rain so I unpacked my umbrella and made my way towards the exit (surprisingly enough, people were still coming into the festival despite the weather). By the time I returned to State Center, the rain was gone.