Author Archives: Jonathan

About Jonathan

Jonathan is a freelance writer, editor and photographer based in Orlando, Fla.

Photos: Lung Force Expo 2018 at SeaWorld Orlando

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Photos: UM Archaeology Lab Day

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Spoopy little memes like these

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Heroes in a hard-shell

I just got a quick snack at a national Mexican food chain on I-Drive. They were out of hard-shell tacos in the tray in front of her, so she went in back (I didn’t ask her to do this) to get some. She comes back with two (one short of the combo), and then immediately asks if I want “hard or soft shell?”

I said nothing, and she immediately snaps “what the hell you have to be so RUDE to me for?! It’s uncalled for.”

While I’m trying to figure out what’s she’s talking about, her (male) coworker at the next station leans in and gives me this “aw, sheet, you in trouble now” look.

“I ask you a simple question,” she continued, “and you got this look like I stupid or something. I wanna know WHY? Huh? HUH? Hmpph, that’s what I thought…”

“The irony is, only one of us is shouting.”

“I ain’t ‘shouting,’ I’m just trying to get your order. YOU’RE the one being all rude here for no reason. I just askin’ why, now what kind of ‘tacos’ do you want?”

“If it please the gentle lady,” I replied without a shred of sarcasm (which wasn’t easy), “may I have the finest diced chicken with-”

“Now, you just being a damned jerk. STOP IT!! Geez.”

Yea, sooo being polite is now “being a jerk,” and her coworker still said nothing.

“Get over yourself already. I mean, Jesus, you ain’t THAT important. Just drop the damned thing and tell me if you want on your tacos. It ain’t hard.”

“I wish it was THAT easy,” I said, she rolls her eyes, “but it’s not. Now may I please get…”

“See how easy that was? Do you want anything else?”

“Yes, I want your shouting to stop echoing around in my head so I can eat in peace.”

“That wasn’t my question: Do you want additional toppings or not?”

“No, thank you, kindly, ma’am.”

“Pay at the register,” she said coldly.

Fortunately, the cashier seemed friendly enough, and offered a quiet apology for the experience. While he sounded sincere enough, it wasn’t enough to save my meal.

The coffee (from the nearby Wawa) that I finished drinking while writing this post was decent enough, so there’s that…

 

P.SI worked fast food so I know the kind of pressure they’re under to be fast and friendly ALL the time. It’s very taxing – especially on a Friday night when you’d rather be with your friends. Fortunately, all that justifies the rude behavior displayed towards me here.

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Fall in Florida

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News: Facebook achievement

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Live blog: Michael in Central Florida (3)

9:32am – Woken up by an automated call from my doctor’s office. At least, it isn’t “Rachel from Cardholder Services.”

10am – Tropical Storm/Surge Watches are now in effect for Coastal North Carolina… but have been lifted for the Alabama/Mississippi border region.

11:20am – A still graphic from TWC shows Tampa Bay is out of immediate danger, though strong outlying bands are still expected throughout the day into Thursday.

11:57am – However, NWC office in Tampa says that while most of Central Florida will be “uneffected” by Michael, Tampa Bay can still get “high storm surge, extensive coastal flooding and severe damage to docks, marinas and coastal dunes.”

12:04pm – Eyewall of Michael coming ashore along the coast of the Florida Panhandle…life threatening storm surge and catastrophic winds moving onshore.

12:37pm – Thank you to people calling/texting me, but as I said above, “Central Florida is under no immediate threat due to this storm” (I’m just bored, lol)

1pm – Hurricane Michael intensifies (cat 4) as it makes landfall near Mexico Beach Florida (nowhere near me) with life-threatening storm surge, hurricane force winds and heavy rainfall occurring over the Florida panhandle…

1:09pm – Duke Energy is predicting that at least 100k customers will lose power due to the storm.

1:13pm – Gov. Rick Scott activated the Florida Disaster Fund to help with the aftermath of the storm

1:37pm – Unfortunately, all the news stories I’m seeing now are “live coverage” (which do me exactly zero good, lol) so, I may have to end today’s live blog a bit early…

Categories: florida, hurricanes, news, North Florida, Orlando, Tampa, weather | Leave a comment

Live blog: Michael in Central Florida (2)

10am: While Central Florida is not expected to see a direct hit (aside from periphery rain/wind), the governor warned that the Panhandle, Big Bend and Gulf Coast cities as far south as Tampa could see dangerous storm surges of 8-12’ as the storm approaches.

Noon: Yahoo News is reporting that Michael is now a category 2 storm.

1:04pmThe Atlanta Journal-Constitution is reporting that Georgia has declared a “State of Emergency

1:45pm – Governor Rick Scott orders mandatory evacuations for 11 Floridian counties.

1:50pmThe Orlando Sentinel is reporting that, with winds of 110mph, Michael is “nearing a category 3 storm” with winds tomorrow topping 125mph.

2:14pm – United Airlines has canceled flights scheduled for Tuesday evening through Wednesday afternoon to three airports in Florida — Pensacola, Panama City and Destin.

2:21pm – Radar on TWC shows small bands of moderate rain are moving through southern Orlando. The sky over SeaWorld is dark, but the steady winds seem relatively calm… for now anyway.

2:39pmOrlando Weekly is reporting that Florida Democrats are suing to extend the voter registration deadlines due to the hurricane.

3:12pm – The Washington Examiner is reporting that Hurricane Michael could cause “13 billion in property damages

4pm – Tropical Storm Warnings are in effect for Eastern/Southern Georgia with Tropical Storm Watches in effect for both North and South Carolina (neither of which need this after the pounding they took from Florence).

4:08pmUSA Today is saying Michael could be one of the worst storms on record to hit the Florida Panhandle.

4:28pm – A larger swath of heavy rain has just descended upon Orange County, but Central Florida is still slated to get less than 3” of rain out of this storm (a change from their previous estimate of 1-2”)

5:19pm – The rain band from the previous line appears to have moved offshore as sunlight barely pokes its way through the clouds. Yet, landfall in Northern Florida is still a day away…

Categories: florida, hurricanes, news, North Florida, Orlando, Tampa, weather | Leave a comment

Live blog: Michael in Central Florida

1:12pm – Phone is charged, so I check the forecast on TWC app: Rain chance is negligible, but the winds have strengthen a bit, so I grab a light windbreaker and my hat and go downstairs to wait for the bus. As I’m waiting, a light rain begins to fall…

1:33pm – arrive at the bus stop outside the Publix at Regency Center. The rain has now stopped, and I am able to take some pictures of some ibis feeding in the wet ground near the pond before going inside the nearby McDonalds. Oh, and the new mystery store they just built next to Freddy’s is another Starbucks so yah… I guess.

2:19pm – leave Publix to find it is once again raining lightly, but, as I am waiting there, it slowly gets heavier and is a full-fledged downpour by the time we reach SeaWorld.

2:45pm – Did I mention, my umbrella was back at the unit? Because it was, and I’m now soaking wet… and so are my groceries, but at least, we’re inside as the rain slowly winds down outside. Not sure if standard a summer storm or an early “feeder band” (landfall in Florida is still 2 days away).

3:30pm – TWC is reporting that Gov. Rick Scott has issued a “State of Emergency” for all of Northern Florida. Mandatory evacuations are ordered for three counties along the Gulf Coast.

4pm – National Hurricane Center is reporting that Storm Surge/Hurricane warnings have been issued for Florida’s Gulf Coast stretching to the Alabama border (from there west is a Tropical Storm Warning). Rainfall totals along the Northern Gulf Coast are expected to be between 4-8” (whereas Orlando, which is not expected to be hit directly, will get 2-3”)

4:30pm – FSU closes its Tallahassee and Panama City campuses in advance of the storm.

7pm – No new warnings/watches, and rainfall is still predicted to be between 4-8” in Northern Florida/Southern Georgia with heavier hit areas could get as much as 12”.

9:05pm – moderate rain is back, but it’s expected to stop again by midnight. You’ll forgive me if I don’t feel like staying up to confirm this… right?

Categories: florida, hurricanes, news, North Florida, Orlando, weather, Williamsburg | Leave a comment

Photo: A special visitor

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UPDATE: Miami Hurricanes defeated the FSU Seminoles : 28-27

Categories: entertainment, florida, games, Miami Gardens, news, photography, South Florida, sports, UM news, University of Miami | Leave a comment

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